Negativity is never the optimum way of dealing with any situation. In fact, in most cases it keeps you stuck in it, blocking real change. Anything that is done with negative energy will become contaminated by it and in time give rise to more pain, more unhappiness. Furthermore, any negative inner state is contagious: Unhappiness spreads more easily than a physical disease.

I need to be awaken. reading so much doesnt seems to make me wiser, doesnt seem to make me "put them into life" so why read you may ask, but then again, why not, I don't like to be negative and it is true sometimes taking part of me away in bits pieces, and you don't know when will they even stop. perhaps it wont even, if I continue with these negativity, you suck, so fucking much. go away, asshole.

I miss you

I always always is battling with the same old feeling whenever I am about to call it a day and simply just sleep. I always missed the same thing that misses didn't go. I miss my dog. Really a lot. I missed every little thing of him. I missed being a owner, buying little treats and shampoos. It's unbearable to always remember the loss. Because it shouldn't even just end there. You don't know sometimes when the heart and mind is conscious how hard is it to snuggle with his aliked soft toys and shut the eyes and go to bed. I am
Still tearing. Always. Alone. On bed to sleep. I'm always calling, bb I love you. JiE jiE miss you, so fucking much

1002;

You can hardly describe this feeling you always have on your birthday. This day can be very normal simple busy filled enjoyable or whatever, but you'll just feel special whatever whoever Gona makes it good or bad seriously. I haven't had a lousy birthday yet though, I'm kinda lucky in a way that I've a group of girlfriends which I supposed will never forget, a childhood buddy who will never fail to send me birthday cards, a BFF who always try to plan something, a boyfriend try to do something too, big small, he'll try. .. My family doesn't really have the habit of celebrating like for me or what but I really dont mind cos the love they shower are everyday, they don't just give extra love only on birthdays. So this birthday, I have a new special frien with me.. And her name is #xiuyu aka ding.

I cant handle I.

Why is it so bloody hard to at least maintain life's momentum? Is not that I have so much concerns unhappiness and such on life and humanity but because it's just me. I don't know how to handle me now. I have not been handling me infact. I let it have it's way but just sometimes it doesn't seems to
Go in the right track. I can't say I have not been happy but I can't also say I am happy. Fact is because I am
Not genuine happy. I do smile I laugh but I know very much all these are so much on the surface only. I do miss the kinda natural happy thing I used to produce but why do it seems so vague now where had it really gone to? I have been constantly worried, on a daily basis. I can't stop myself from being afraid worried and simply just live as it is today only. I try very hard to continuously remind myself. Sometimes i succeed, sometimes I don't . I know very well the roller coaster tracks my emotions have been running, but it just seems that I can't take over the control of my damn life. It's really in a mess. Theres so much things I wanna do, theres so many books I wanna read, research I wanna do, time I wanna spent with my family & myself.i am not ranting, not. I'm just wondering, why hasn't life be really fair for my family and I. Why?

I can't put what's haunting me aside. Not because I do not want to but simply because I do not know how to.. When I tried pitting it behind me, it came again, behind and it came again. Just what the hell? I wanto be happy and free of all such problems can, why is it so hard.. So hard to be really happy. Why has happiness became a word with no in depth meaning?

呼吸的痛

It sucks to miss something that is gone eternity you can only feel helpless and you only have yourself to blame for the fact that nothing can ever be done to bring you back to life

Unhappy

I've been feeling perpetually unhappy for _______ as long as I can remember. Joke, I could tell my sibling to "take 1 step at a time, dont go and think about those which have not happened yet." Yet, most of the time, i am seen not applying it. So you tell me, I am not the role model myself, how did I ever, how could I even ever, try to talk him round. What happened to my life, a question which I've been consistently asking my own damn bloody self. More often than not, I am not seen with a proper answer. If this has never befall upon her, everything would be okay. I'll be fine. My life won't change. I wont feel fucked, I'll be happy. I'll live happily.

Trying very hard to pretend and i know i succeed. I always do, but right in which we dont even have to go too deep, its tearing. Every single bloody day, it hurts.

Life sucks, that's the word for it.

Merry Christmas?

nothingness ;

That's what ive been constantly feeling. I've never felt such nothingness listless for all I can remember but why had this year been such a mess. A mess where it's so hard to fixed things up. The kinda lousiness you constantly feeling. You know how helpless sometimes I am.. I don't know what to do to cheer myself instantly. Sigh, it sucked all sucked so freaking much

#1 女:謝謝你喜歡我。
男:我也喜歡當年喜歡著妳的我。

#2 原本我以為我是個超有自信的人，在喜歡的女孩面前，我只是一個膽小鬼。

#3 我很喜歡妳，非常喜歡妳，總有一天我一定會追到妳。

#4 成長，最殘酷的部份就是，女孩子永遠比同年齡的男孩子成熟。

#5 人生本來就有很多事是徒勞無功的啊。

#6 被你喜歡過，就感覺別人沒那麼喜歡了。

#7 女孩的成熟，沒有一個男孩招架得住

#8 戀愛最美好的，就是曖昧的時候。

#9 或許，在另一個平行時空裡，我們是在一起的。

#10 我瞧不起的不是成績不好的人，我瞧不起的是明明自己不用功念書，卻只會瞧不起用功念書的人。

#11 我敢跟妳賭，十年後，我連log是什麼都不知道，照樣活得很好。

#12 這種尖酸的題目就算解得出來，對人生還是一點意義都沒有啦。

#13 如果你真的很喜歡一個女孩的話，當新郎不是妳的話，那麼你永遠無法祝福她。結果：不，當你真的很喜歡一個女孩的話，那麼無論新郎是誰，你都會真心祝福她。

#14 每一個男生都想在自己心上人面前，展現自己最強的一面。但是這個方式，並不管用。

#15 不像考卷，所有複雜困難的問題，都能得到一個解答。真實人生裡，有些事永遠也沒有答案。

#16 我想成為一個很厲害的人，讓這個世界因為有了我而有一點點的改變而我的世界，不過就是妳的心。

#17 下一次浪來，會帶走女孩留在沙灘上的美好足跡，但我們還在。刻在我們心中女孩的模樣，也會還在。


You Are The Apple Of My Eye ♥